And so, we mark another anniversary of 9/11.

What is most in the minds of most of us this year, nine years later, is the proposed Ground Zero mosque. And how very angry most of us are about it.

Which is why most in mind this 9/11 is the Holocaust.

Yes, as regular visitors to this space are well aware, I have my beefs with the Jewish people, find plenty to criticize. But that does not mean that I don’t love and greatly admire the Jewish people. Indeed, the very reason for my criticisms and my disappointments is because I hate when such a wonderful people falls short.

And I must admit this whole Ground Zero mosque controversy has made my admiration for us grow.

Consider. 9/11 was, of course, a horrible day. Almost 3,000 innocent people were murdered in the name of hate.

But it was just one day, one act. And while 3,000 innocent lives is an incalculable loss, it is not six million innocent lives. Not even close.

And yet, we find two things as this country commemorates 9/11. That we really have done very little to remember, and that what memories we are expressing are coming out in anger.

9/11 took place nine years ago and yet the site of the World Trade Center still remains basically a big hole. The memorial has not yet been built, the new buildings showing our resolve have not yet been built.

In a way, we’ve forgotten 9/11, done very little to make sure to enshrine its memory, done very little to prove our resilience. No shrine at the site, no new structure at the site.

By contrast, consider how the Jewish people have dealt with the Holocaust, a tragedy of far, far greater proportion. The Holocaust went on for years, decimated the Jewish world, claimed six million of our men, women and children.

And how did we respond to that kind of devastation? By remembering in real and meaningful ways, by rebuilding in real and meaningful ways.

We have not used the devastation done to us as an excuse for not trying, as reason to lick our wounds and feel sorry for ourselves. Instead, we have chosen to create and build, make Jewish life better and stronger.

Just three years after the end of the Holocaust, the Jewish nation had mobilized and brought about the rebirth of the Jewish state, the establishment of Israel. Just three years later.

In the United States, we went about the business of building a vibrant, strong, powerful Jewish community, with a Jewish communal structure made up of hundreds of Jewish organizations, serving every need of the Jewish people, and with Jews assuming important roles throughout American society. In government, the arts, business, everywhere, Jews are accomplished, prominent, successful, amazing.

At the same time, we have made sure to never forget, to remember the Holocaust in concrete and innovative ways that transmit the memory to future generations.

And that do so without bitterness and anger.

I have been struck at just how angry so many are about the Ground Zero mosque. It’s as if what happened on 9/11 gave us license to be mad, to express our understandable and justified pain at what took place by being outraged.

Jews, amazing, thankfully, beautifully, have taken a different course. Certainly we have every right, every reason, six million reasons, to be incredibly angry and bitter and to never let go of that anger and bitterness. That would be human nature.

But it is not Jewish nature. We are not mad at the world, but very much a part of the world, indeed, in many ways, at the forefront of the world. We are leaders in medical discoveries and innovations, in technological discoveries and innovations, in things that make life better for many.

Meanwhile, Israel has warm relations with Germany, the very country that perpetrated the crimes. We will never forget, but we have forgiven, we have let go of our anger, have chosen to live our lives and to work with Germany in our mutual interest and to our mutual benefit.

That very fact shows a maturity and a humanity that is a tremendous credit to the Jewish people.

Israel could very easily have said it would never have diplomatic relations with Germany, would have no trade with Germany, would have nothing to do with Germany. But Israel has understood that hatred directed outward, also damages us inside, that anger expressed without end winds up eating up the one expressing it.

Beyond that, we have taken what happened to us in the Holocaust and used it to teach valuable lessons to the world about what hatred can bring, about the need for tolerance and understanding. We have taken something negative that happened to us and used it to bring a positive message to others.

We have taken what happened to us and taken it upon ourselves to advocate for others, to stand up and be there for others. We could have easily decided that the world was not there for us, turned away from us, turned against us and so we have no reason to care about anyone else, help anyone else, be there for anyone else.

No, we have chosen, no, we have said, precisely because we know how it feels to be abandoned, precisely because we suffered from no one caring or reaching out, we will be the first to care, to reach out, to show the way, to show how people should respond, how people should act.

We have taken what happened to us and used it as fuel for us to do all we can to ensure it does not happen to others.

That is acting in the most moral of ways, following the most G-dly of paths.

While many Americans have used 9/11 as reason to oppose and point fingers at others, Jews have used the Holocaust to create and open hands to others.

And speaking of G-d, as the calendar would have it this year, exactly one week after the American people mark 9/11, the Jewish people mark Yom Kippur.

Just as Jews have shown the world how a people is to remember and rebuild after tragedy, so I believe Yom Kippur needs to be a reminder for Jews that it is G-d who judges the Jews, and not Jews who should be judging their fellow Jews.

I’ve been at this Jewish journalism thing for quite a long time, and been at this living a Jewish life even longer. And the biggest change I’ve seen in all that time is how judgmental Jews have become of each other.

We all do it to all of us. Orthodox judges Reform, Reform judges Orthodox, right wing judges left wing, left wing judges right wing. And in every case, we seem to find the other side falling woefully short. Maybe even so short it’s okay to see them as not really Jewish.

All of which is bad enough, tragic enough for a people whose unity is its greatest strength, but even worse is how on an individual level, we all seem to be so very judgmental of each other, see so clearly the faults of other Jews, what’s wrong with them, why to have nothing to do with them, talk badly about them, turn our nose up at them.

We all seem to know what’s wrong with everyone else, what they need to fix or change, what’s the matter with them. The overall effect on all of us, of each of us doing that to others of us, is to create an atmosphere in Jewish life that is so negative, so destructive, so ugly.

Yom Kippur reminds us that in Judaism, we are to leave the judging to G-d. He and He alone knows what’s in the heart and soul of a person, He and He alone understands where a person is coming from and what they are going through, He and He alone knows what’s expected of them and what they are capable of.

He and He alone is in a position to judge. Not us. None of us about any of us.

Somehow that’s a message we don’t seem to get and don’t seem to carry with us from Yom Kippur through the rest of the year.

But it is one that is vital for the peace and health and future of the Jewish people.

After the Holocaust, we understood that it would be damaging to us as a people to not let go of our anger. After Yom Kippur, we need to understand that it is damaging to each of us as people to ever think we have the right to judge other Jews, look down on other Jews, draw conclusions about other Jews, make nasty comments about other Jews, not treat other Jews, all other Jews, with respect and dignity and acceptance and love.

Yes, it is the Jewish thing to respect and love all other Jews. No, it is most definitely not the Jewish thing to judge other Jews.

As Yom Kippur reminds us, shows us, teaches us, that is G-d’s job.